Let's face it, sometimes feeling sexy can be hard. Like, really hard. You might ooze confidence during a work presentation, but it's a totally different ballgame when it comes to sex. "It's hard to be open with your sexuality—for anybody—because you feel vulnerable to rejection.
The trick is to know your comfort level and then to push it just a little bit—that's all you need.
Now, we know it can be intimidating to make the leap from tame girl to sex goddess overnight, but a few small tweaks can make you feel wilder and more self-assured in bed. "There's a misconception that taking charge has to be something big," says Greer. But in reality, tiny acts can give you a major confidence boost. Test out these 10 feel-sexy-right-now moves tonight. Samantha Jones would be so proud.
Splurge on racy lingerie. Sure, you look great in a bra and underwear, but wearing something that is totally not you (like bright red lace or a sexy-as-hell corset) will make you feel like you're actually playing into the role of a seductress. You don't need to break the bank for a pearl thong—just get sexy-wear that's a bit more risqué than your normal tastes.
Play an unfamiliar character. We know, we know, we know: Sexual dress-up is so been-there-done-that. But we're not talking about dolling up head-to-toe in a French maid uniform. Step outside the box and portray a totally new persona whose sexiness you want to emulate. You're basically channeling your sexual spirit animal (whether that's Katy Perry or Rihanna), which will help you get into character and mask any insecurity from your everyday personality.
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Make dirty talk dirtier. It is possible to make a no-brainer even sexier. Use your finger to trace a word on your partner's body—like "kiss" or "blowjob" If they're right, perform the move. If they're wrong, well, use your best judgment.
Blast a libido-pumping song. It doesn't have to be as slow and romantic as John Legend's "All of Me." Listen to something that makes you feel a little wild and sensual, says Kerner, like something that would make you lose your inhibitions and dance like crazy in a club. Not only will it drown out any nerves (and any awkward noises), but it'll also create a vibe like you're actually sneaking away in a crowded party to hookup. What's hotter than that?
Dim the lights. According to our recent survey, both men and women prefer dim lights for sex. It's pretty obvious why—it's just enough light to see what you're doing and it gives you both a soft, flattering shadow.
Spritz a special perfume. You know the bottle—it's the one you only spray for weddings, first dates, and business dinners. Engler recommends applying this eau-du-jour before you get it on to give yourself an instant confidence boost.
Lather on oil. Essential oils make your skin look smooth, shiny, and so damn sexy. It's the perfect alternative to lingerie that requires little to no effort (or money), says Engler. Just rub a little on your body and take a glance at yourself in the mirror. Yep, you basically look like a swimsuit model.
